Called to serve?

(Hi messy room)

Sister missionary. That's been my only thought for the last 4 days. Should I serve a mission? I'm trying to find the answer, and I'm also trying to tell it to my parents without dying in the attempt. By then, I'm experimenting with outfits to see what I'd look like. My mom used only one word to describe myself: NUN. But once more, I'm careless.

Yesterday I met with the boys (apparently I'm one of them). And then, one whom i hadn't talked before, asked me to show him a picture of my boyfriend. I told him that i don't have a boyfriend and silence was made in the room. He freaked out and yelled: you liar! Seriously? But you're pretty and smart. Well, honey, if you say so to a girl you haven't talked before, you have to know that the situation will turn really awkward. I just don't get if that was a weird try to flirt or a weird comment. Buuut I have an opinion about it as i have about mostly everything. I don't understand the point that if you're "pretty and smart" you must have a boyfriend. What if you just don't want to? Does that mean that if you're ugly, you're not supposed to have one? Why is everybody so obsessed with it? I think that single's life is a moment that we have to enjoy as long as it lasts and also that we shouldn't rush into a relationship just because of loneliness feelings. We are surronded by a bunch of people. Who can tell you that one the boys you'll meet this summer can't be the love of your life? Or maybe that girl in grocery store you met last week... I don't know, nutty thought of the night.

Nevertheless, I have to say that I never follow my own advices. It's not that i don't want, it's just... I can't. I'd love that things would be as easy as writing but unfortunatelly, they're not. Life is a mess that i can't tidy, at least not everything. And it bothers me. So, I'm trying to deal with my crazy feelings. Writing a blog is kind of a therapy to me, I really hope that you readers don't go mad with all this stuff.

Love,

Irene.